Hit on my muse
- Are you an interior
decorator? Because when I saw you, the entire room became beautiful.
- Did you sit in a pile of
sugar? Cause you have a pretty sweet ass.
- Do you have a Band-Aid?
Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.
- If I were a stop light,
I’d turn red everytime you passed by, just so I could stare at you a bit
longer.
- If you were a vegetable
you’d be a cute-cumber.
- There are people who say
Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Apparently, none of them have
ever been in your arms.
- Are you
an orphanage? Cause I wanna give you kids.
- Are you my Appendix?
Because I have a funny feeling in my stomach that makes me feel like I
should take you out.
- I was so enchanted by
your beauty that I ran into that wall over there. So I’m going to need
your name and number for insurance purposes.
- I’m not staring at your
boobs. I’m staring at your heart.
- Can I take your picture
to prove to all my friends that angels do exist?
- Your body is 65% water
and I’m thirsty.
- My doctor says I’m
lacking Vitamin U.
- Can I follow you home?
Cause my parents always told me to follow my dreams.
- If I were a cat I’d spend
all 9 lives with you.
- Smoking is hazardous to
your health… and baby, you’re killing me!
- You must be a hell of a
thief because you stole my heart from across the room.
- Do you have a twin
sister? Then you must be the most beautiful girl in the world!
- You know I’d like to
invite you over, but I’m afraid you’re so hot that you’ll skyrocket my
air-conditioning bill.
- If I were to ask you out
on a date, would your answer be the same as the answer to this question?
- Are you a campfire? Cause
you are hot and I want s'more.
- I bet you $20 you’re
gonna turn me down.
- I like Legos, you like
Legos, why don’t we build a relationship?
- Would you grab my arm so
I can tell my friends I’ve been touched by an angel?
- There’s only one thing I
want to change about you, and that’s your last name.
- Did you have lucky charms
for breakfast? Because you look magically delicious!
- Can I borrow your cell
phone? I need to call animal control, because I just saw a fox!
- I’m no organ donor but
I’d be happy to give you my heart.
- Kiss me if I’m wrong, but
dinosaurs still exist, right?
- Do you believe in love at
first sight, or should I walk by again?
- You see my friend over
there? [Point to friend] He wants to know if YOU think I’M cute.
- Can I borrow a kiss? I
promise I’ll give it back.
- Are you my phone charger?
Because without you, I’d die.
- Are you a cat? Cause you
are purrrfect
- You know how they say
skin is the largest organ on the human body? Not in my case.
- My lips are like
skittles. Wanna taste the rainbow?
- I have an
“owie” on my lip. Will you kiss it and make it better?
- Hey baby, I must be a
light switch, cuz every time I see you, you turn me on!
- Do I know you? Cause you
look just like my next girlfriend/boyfriend.
- Have you always been this
cute, or did you have to work at it?
- Was your father a
mechanic? Then how did you get such a finely tuned body?
- Apart from being sexy,
what do you do for a living?
- Is it hot in here or is
it just you?
- I blame you for global
warming… your hotness is too much for the planet to handle!
- You’re single. I’m
single. Coincidence? I think not.
- Stop, drop, and roll,
baby. You are on fire.
- Baby, you’re so hot, you
make the equator look like the north pole.
- I hope there’s a fire
truck nearby, cause you’re smokin’!
- I just got dumped, and I
think that you could make me feel better.
- If you were a burger at
McDonalds, you’d be McGorgeous.
- Your hand looks heavy.
Let me hold it for you.
- You’re so hot, I could
bake cookies on you.
- Is your car battery dead?
Because I’d like to jump you.
- I’m lost. Can you tell me
which road leads to your heart?
- It’s a good thing I wore gloves today. Otherwise you’d be too hot to handle.